i never realized how fast this school year has been going by
im amazed that i survived HAHA; i have to admit, this year was FUCKING hard
i swear i just walked in school & then BAM- "dont forget to register for your SATs" "consider colleges" "aim for good grades" "scholarship oppurtunities" BLAH BLAH BLAH
its not even the stress of getting into college, its more like the work handed in front of me

NEVER i repeat NEVER take calculus . i'm really good at math actually, but now i just suck at calculus, fucking hard shit right there
maybe its just the teacher, or maybe i just suck HAHA, well i understand and do all the hw, its just that freaken the tests are 9240752093487520493857 times harder than the homework . to be honest, i've only passed one quiz/test out of the whole semester, i got a 75 . my averages are around 60 .

blah eff school
fml

nothings the same anymore; everythings so boring now
same thing all day errrday, wake up go to school work in class take tests go home do homework go to sleep
next morning same shit

its soooooo boring

no matter what i do its always wrong or not good enough
cant i freaken just do as a please without meeting expectations

just fucken leave me alone im tired

well, this weekend was really . . . idk how to describe it
shopping all weekend pretty much
i have no money, luckily, most of the stuff i got wasn't paid with my money

scary part of this weekend
at church, some kid blacked out, RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME
he was seriously in the pew in front of me
we were all kneeling & then BAM
kid falls & hits his head on the seat
his mother starts freaking out & i couldnt even move
natural intinct; call 911 ! but i seriously could not even move
i was so shocked
well, thank god he woke up
he had no idea what happened to him !
guess its some disability, he blacks out
scariest thing ever

& then i come back home from in n out & my sister tells me that my aunt is in the hospital
she fainted cuz her blood pressure was 211
thank god it wasnt a stroke
shes in the hospital right now & now me & my dad have to go to the hospital for a blood pressure test
my dad's prediabetic- me however, am pre pre diabetic if thats even real
basic line is, my life span might not be as long as i want it to be :[